So I was just thinking to myself, maybe I should start up the yourbipolargirl blog again; I’m feeling so manic these days, and what is there to do but talk to my therapist about it or tell good friends about it … friends who don’t understand bipolar disorder anyhow. ( I’m kind of manic right now!, I’ll say, only to watch their eyes glaze over with a mix of confusion and disinterest.) Jacked up on the caffeine that probably jolted my brain into thinking about blogging in the first place, I logged on to WordPress a little while ago to start up the blog I’d initially had on Blogger; I searched for the url; I found that, damn, it was taken. ARGH. I couldn’t believe someone had hijacked my blog idea.
Then, I logged onto the e-mail address I registered for yourbipolargirl months ago so that I could have this anoymous Blogger blog. Strangely, I find a “please moderate comment’ e-mail in regards to a lovely comment made by Angela G in response to a yourbipolargirl wordpress blog. Huh? Like finding a note I’d written to myself while I was drunk all crumpled up in the back of a drawer, I logged on to this dusty old site I apparently created on December 14th. I have no recollection of doing so.
I’m chalking this up to bipolar amnesia, a condition no one else seems to be talking about it. But I swear, it is a phenomenon. How else to explain those fits of activity forgotten once we come down from being buoyed up on a manic cloud of ideas?
(I have heard Topamax, a drug I take to counteract the weight-gaining side effects of Depakote, dubbed “Stupemax.” The weight gain is something I won’t go through again, but maybe I should reconsider the Stupemax to help fend off the bipolar-induced-memory-loss.)